Han Solo: The Only Male Role Model Worth Having

Everybody needs a role model. Some look to athletes. Waste of time. Politicians. Fuck that. The clergy? Jesus, no! Historical figures? More than likely all lies. When it comes to male role models the only ones worth having are fictional ones—and, much like the Dignified Devil himself, the best balance for a man to shoot for is 80 percent dignified, 20 percent devil. In other words, Han Solo. Let’s let the man speak for himself…

“She ain’t much, but she’s got it where it counts, kid.”

He’s talking about his ship, the Millenium Falcon—his version of a 1964 Ford Mustang, albeit with a ding in the fender or two—but he’s expressing a universal truth: what is on the outside is far less important than what is on the inside.

Question all assumptions fired at you and challenge all accusations—even if they come from a princess.

“Keep your distance, but don’t look like you’re trying to keep your distance.”

And over-eager man is an undignified man. In all things, no one likes desperation. Confidence goes a long away when mixed with just the right amount of mystery.

“How we doin’? That bad, huh?”

That being said, there is such a thing as too much confidence—an unrealistic confidence, if you will—which can lead to disaster. You may need to solicit a reality check, and when you do it, ask for it sans sugar.

“Why don’t you use your divine influence and get us out of this?”

Sometimes in business and life you have to swing for the fences. It should be a last resort, but when needed, pull the lever, break the glass in case of emergency and call in all your favors.

“Don’t get cocky.”

No one likes an arrogant son of a bitch—least of all arrogant sons of bitches. Learning to balance confidence in yourself and your ego is a delicate maneuver, but it’s one worth performing.

“Then I’ll see you in Hell!”

There is something to be said about getting in the last word. In times of conflict sometimes you just need to shut down the conversation. Or maybe you just want to prove that you know what you are doing might be impossible but you’re going ahead and doing it regardless. A man with nothing to lose is a most dangerous man.

“No time to discuss this as a committee.”

Nothing great ever came out of a committee. Two heads—or three, or three hundred—are definitely not better than one. The exception that proves the rule is the Star Wars prequels—George Lucas had way too much autonomy and should have had more No Men on hand.

“Scoundrel? I like the sound of that.”

Nothing wrong with admitting your dalliances with the grubbier side of life. You can’t be perfect all the time. As a matter of fact, it builds character to get down into the mud and roll around every once in a while. How else are you going to learn right from wrong?

“Never tell me the odds.”

Thanks to the internet we are mired in data, opinions, and Likes. As a matter of fact, it seems nothing sees the light of day until it gets run through a computer, analyzed, homogenized, and spit out as something lifeless, useless, and risk-free. Much like doing away with committees, the dignified man trusts his instincts and take risks.

“Who’s scruffy-looking?”

Question all assumptions fired at you and challenge all accusations—even if they come from a princess.

“I prefer a straight fight to all this sneaking around.”

Gossip, innuendo, and backstabbing are unmanly and should be not only avoided, but shamed when encountered. A real man prefers to deal with things head-on and shuns passive-aggression.

“No reward is worth this.”

There are some things in life that just are not worth it. Life is short, and there is little room for bigots, fools, and the like. You have to decide who and what you make room for in your life.

“Look, Your Worshipfulness, let’s get one thing straight. I take orders from just one person: me.”

It sounds a little harsh, and more than a little egocentric, but there is some truth here. When it comes to your life, you have to be in control. No matter what happens, the buck stops with you.

“Offensive operations, often times, is the surest, if not the only means of defence.”

Okay, George Washington said that, not Han Solo. Now, I don’t condone the use of firearms when resolving a conflict, but when your back is to the wall, and all other options have played out, the element of surprise is one hell of an ally. And when you strike, the intent should be to make sure your opponent can’t strike back. In other words, shoot first.

  • April 05, 2016
  • Cory Skaaren
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